The Truth You’ve Always Known
I’ve had so many ideas recently for blog posts and even one or two bigger dreams and yet lately I’ve found myself frozen. I haven’t moved forward in the way that I had hoped. That happens doesn’t it? Sometimes we want so badly to accomplish something and suddenly we find ourselves not moving toward that dream at all. Instead, going in a different direction, seeking approval, love, good feelings from somewhere outside of ourselves. Often yearning for them, from another person. We have those moments of drifting toward someone else to satisfy us, because we think within them, we will find our answers. We will finally find our worth. They will be the one to prove to us and the rest of the world, how good we really are. How worthy we really are.
These are hard things to admit to oneself, these are hard things to admit to myself. To know that there are moments that I look to him, to feel my wholeness is a hard a truth to see and speak. It is behavior that will never result in the outcomes that I am hoping for, in my career or love. We can never find our worth or the whole of who we really are, in another human being. It is an unsustainable high that we will forever be chasing, if we do not see it for what it is and course correct.
The beauty of this life though, is that we get to start over at any given second. We get to forgive ourselves and do better at any given moment. We are always whole, our dreams are always waiting for us to line up with them, independent of anything that anyone else says, does, or thinks about us. Imagine the power in that! It makes so much more sense that the way we feel be dependent on our own beliefs about ourselves, then anything anyone else could do or say. He may think I am a simply amazing woman, he may think I am beautiful, he may have love in heart for me, but if I cannot find that love within myself, I won’t ever be able to feel his. And so, I’m tapping on this keyboard, turning back toward my dreams. Letting you know, that you can too.